Strength from Weakness and What You "Can't Not Do"

I spent the earlier part of the day--beginning at 4:30 a.m.--driving 5 hours round-trip to participate in a 3-hour meeting dealing with Talent and Talent Management. My talent is clearly not in scheduling.

So when I got back to the office, my antennae were sensitive to articles and blog posts connected to either of those topics. Phyllis Roteman from The Learning Rap came through loud and clear with Richard Branson Shows Boredom Can Be Good.

Successful People and Their Struggles

Phyllis notes that:

Richard Branson, the Virgin brand mogul, gets bored easily. He channels this "problem" into a positive by "getting himself into numerous businesses that he can spread himself around in."

Charles Schwab was dyslexic and almost flunked out of Stanford, having failed English twice. In business, he overcame this reading problem by speaking from the heart (nixing the need for reading and writing long memos and speeches).

Cisco CEO John Chambers was also dyslexic, so he relies on memorized speeches and interacting personally with people as much as possible.

Each of these people found a way to succeed in the face of some weakness.

Strengths from Weakness and Natural Talent

I'd like to propose that you and I look at our lives in light of those two gifts. And they are both gifts, although the first one may be difficult to see at first.

Strengths from Weakness

This isn't happy talk or psycho-babble.

Each of us is faced with some struggle around which we have to make a choice. Either we succumb to the struggle or we see it through. What we label as "overcoming" is really the molding of our character through adversity. In that process, we discover and develop strengths that serve our natural talents and purpose in life. All of the examples above reflect that.

If you choose to acknowledge your struggle and see it through, you'll end up leading and mentoring others who are struggling with similar challenges.

Why?

You'll possess knowledge, wisdom, and empathy about the issue that others cannot gain from classroom study. It will become an area of passion and personal meaning. You'll become known for your insight and strength.

What You "Can't Not Do"

Your Natural Talent(s)

If you're reading this, you are probably committed to personal and professional development. So at some point, you ask yourself "What are my real talents?"

I do a lot of mid-career counseling with executives who also wrestle with that question. Every one has read about  Following Your Bliss, Pursuing Your Passion, and Discovering Your Strengths. They get the idea. But they find it difficult to separate skills that they've developed from the talents they possess.

During one session--in the midst of my own frustration--I blurted out, "What can't you not do?"

That proved to be a breakthrough question and has turned into a cornerstone of the career counseling part of my practice.

Look at your life. What can't you not do? No matter what your job title or job description, what do you find it impossible not to get involved with? What are you always getting in trouble for because you're not supposed to be doing it--or doing it that way?

Start paying attention to that and you'll start to identify your natural talent(s). And when you're using those talents, you won't even feel as if you are working. That's one of the reasons they can be hard to identify. We're so good at them, we don't recognize them for what they are. And we tend to place a low value on them because they don't "seem like work." Yet they are the part of you that makes you a star.

What to take away

1. When faced with a struggle, recognize that seeing it all the way through will present you with a new strength. You don't yet know what that is.

2. When you make that choice, it will become an area of your life where you will help, guide, and mentor others. Your burden will become one of your gifts.

3. If you are an HR person or manager who is interviewing candidates: Ask the candidate to describe a struggle that has led to a new talent, and how they use it. Pay attention to this. It will be a powerful part of their career potential

4. What can't you not do?

Stop not doing it.

Photo Source: www.nuovo.com

Comments

[Viji]

Hi Steve, do you know me personally? Just kidding. Once I read this post, I wanted to ask you this question. Setbacks are lessons and not the end for me. I touched the death line in 2002 and came back to normal (more than) life with so much spirit and enthusiasm. Yes, you are correct. I just prayed to God, either take me, or else make to stand on my own leg. He listened to my prayers. This second birth is quite interesting  than before. Started valuing petty things which I missed earlier. Wonderful post. Tks. Viji

[Steve Roesler]

Thanks for sharing that, Viji. Your experience is certainly a deep and meaningful one that can offer inspiration for all of us.

[Shane]

Great post Steve. I always like to simplify and sum things up in a nice, neat little package so I'll just say:

"Whatever doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger!"

[Steve Roesler]

Hey, Shane, thanks for the succinct quote.

Let's hope that we have more time to work on the "makes you stronger" part!

Steve

[Mike Wagner]

And my mind returns to the Old Testament again with the phrase, "it was good that I was afflicted."

At least that is what I thought when I read "recognize that seeing it (struggle) all the way through will present you with a new strength."

Thanks for enlarging a strong conversation.

Keep creating,
Mike

[Ellen Weber]

Great post Steve - thanks. What do you say to people who tell you they are unsure what their talent is, so have no idea where to start? Thoughts?

[steveroesler]

Hi, Ellen,

Well, your scenario is the case more often than not. People aren't sure and don't know where to begin.

I use a proprietary instrument that gets at people's talents in communication, relating, and functional categories. There are 54 possibilities--most people have 5-7 areas that would be considered "talents" or giftedness.

But that doesn't really get at the heart of your question, "Where to start?"

What we all want when faced with a dilemma is a genuine sense of hope and related action. To get folks mobilized, I now do two things at the outset:

1. Have the person look at a a list of job descriptions and tell me the 10 that they would never get involved with on a bet. That gives me a good hint at where their talents and passions don't lie. And it's often easier to quickly identify what we don't want before we know what we do want.

2. Then they are asked to write their ten most "enjoyable" experiences in life, beginning in their teen years. These provide the basis for an autobiographical interview that gets at underlying themes and how they connect to show a pattern that combines high degree of competence with high degree of satisfaction.

This is a useful starting place that provides a jumping off point for more in-depth assessment and discussion. Most importantly, it gets people moving in a meaningful direction at a time when they can be feeling bogged down.

Now there's a long answer to a very short question!