Seven Tips For Better Coaching

The response to the Coaching For Managers eGuide (available to you in the right sidebar) has been brisk. So,we're figuring that this is a topic that's genuinely helpful.

I'm in the midst of finishing the wording for a contract with a new coaching client. Since my mind wanders a bit when hunkering down with details, here are some coaching thoughts that emerged during the periodical mental breaks. In my experience, these hold true for both internal and external coaches:

 

Seven Coaching Tips To Consider

1. Take time to accurately diagnose the situation. Begin coaching conversation using open-ended questions, then sit back and let the client hear what (s)he is saying in response. Clients often become  start to recognize behavioral patterns through their own answers to good questions.

2. Ask the unexpected question. How often have you experienced that feeling of being stuck with no apparent options to escape a situation? This bumps up the stress level. The secret here is for the coach to create brainstorming questions that will generate alternatives to the current situation.

3. Get really, really clear about goals. We've all experienced goal-setting of some sort. However, for a goal to be really useful it needs to be meaningful to the individual. Dedicate significant time to working with clients to refine their goals and sign off on them. (I have them physically sign a document. It increases a sense of accountability). 

4. Initiate options. New coaches sometimes rush through this and quickly offer advice. (Hey, it's a lot easier to say, "Do this." Of course, the coach has just taken ownership of the solution).

Effective coaches take time to ask questions that allow the client/employee to come up with some new options that will lead to action and new behavior. Only when options come from the client will you get real commitment to change. The loudest statement a coach can make is by quietly asking a question, then remaining silent.

5. Help evaluate options. Work with the client/employee to develop a set of criteria to evaluate the different options. What investment (energy, money, time,) is needed to put a specific option into practice?

6. Design an action plan. Gee, how mundane, eh? Spending time identifying how a goal will be reached will pay off big time if any glitches are experienced. All you have to do is backtrack and see where things went off track. Also: The plan needs to have a "Here's how you'll know you're successful" element. Coaches help people celebrate; make sure you know when to hold the party.

7. Encourage momentum. Sometime cheerleader, sometime nag; we all need someone to keep us on track. Use phone calls, emails, water cooler conversations, whatever it takes. Remember, it's about moving toward a goal or some kind of change. And you'll enjoy being part of the celebration."

What are you doing that is being helpful to your clients or employees?

Comments

[Mjasmus]

Excellent points, Steve. If I could add one thing, it might be to recognize when you need to dip below the surface and explore emotions. Recognizing emotions is often what moves people into action (how often have we known of a situation where there is no movement - it may be because the emotions around it are blocked, negative, or just not acknowledged).

Thanks for the great post.

[Steve Roesler]

Indeed, MJ, let's make that #8, with the suggestion: "You may need to name the emotion that you are sensing in the other person. If they aren't used to comfortably talking about how they feel, you can be a big help by giving a name to what you see going on and asking if that's correct or is it something else?

As always, gracias MJ

[Kyle_Dover]

I like the list. Especially the point on mundane things like an action plan. In my coaching, I often find people want leadership to be strategic and sexy, when a lot of effective leadership is about simple things done well.

I would suggest one additional point, which is to help people anticipate and prepare for obstacles they will hit when they attempt to apply new methods. A lot of the time I spend in my coaching is not about developing skills but in helping people apply the skills. It's inevitable that people will hit roadblocks when they try new skills and, if not prepared, the roadblock could end their attempt to grow. Effective coaches see the obstacle ahead and they discuss is, so the person is prepared and not surprised.

Would love to talk more about these ideas if you are interested.

Best regards,
Kyle

[Steve Roesler]

Hi, Kyle,

Indeed, no problem there. Consider it added.

I"ve been at this so long :-) that I totally forget (or ignore) that whole "strategic and sexy" thing that you so accurately name. People who are thinking about, or just getting into coaching, should pay attention to that. I realized a long time ago that repeat business and solid referrals came from clients who were willing for us to "roll up our sleeves" together and get to work. It is all about application, getting things done, and getting things done more effectively than before we arrived.

No problem talking about the topic, Kyle. Thanks for taking the time to weigh in.

Best regards,

Steve

[Edsiusa]

This is an excellent list. This really resonated: "The loudest statement a coach can make is by quietly asking a question, then remaining silent." Yes! And remaining silent and waiting for the "a-ha moment" can be the hardest but most rewarding part :)

[Steve Roesler]

Well said, Edsiusa

We seem to think that we are only doing something when we are active or talking. Yet how many people receive the gift of a question followed by the gift of silence with which to reflect upon it?